Exploration 9 Lauren Richards

1). For me one of the writings that I am proud of is my narrative essay. In past English classes I have always struggled with writing a narrative essay however this time I actually wrote something that truly meant something to me which helped a lot. It felt a little weird writing down all of this personal information about myself and the emotions I was experiencing because I have never told anybody about this story. Typically I hide any emotion of sadness away from others because I don't want to feel like people have to worry about me. But while writing this essay I felt a weight lift off of my shoulders because I was finally open to telling others. The story was about my great Uncle Lou's death and how I was coping with it. For me one of the best sections of the writing is here because it shows how much his death affected me:

"When our family finally left my grandparents’ house to return home, I shut myself up in my parents’ bedroom refusing to come out. I felt as though I was in a pit of darkness trying to claw my way out only to be dragged back in again. I began sobbing violently to myself as I thought about the reality death. I realized that there was a fear in me that one day I won’t be able to see my grandparents, parents, or siblings again. I thought about how there will be a time in which I can’t call my mom to have a small chat about what is going on in my day or I can’t go on a little trip with my dad to explore new places and learn through his experiences. It frightened me to know that one day the people who are my biggest supporters in life will not be there. As well as the fact that one day I will not be here on earth as well. My mom tried to come in and comfort me but for some reason, one of the people who I valued most in my life, I didn’t want to be around. I did not want to be seen as this weak little girl who is crying about death. I thought we all know that we are going to die one day it is a fact of life so why was I worrying so much about it? Just get over it it’s a fact of life. She stayed with me holding me in her arms showing me that she is there for me and would always say “everything is all right.” I kept repeating “I don’t want to die” as I was sobbing. While this was all happening my little brother and sister came into the room trying to comfort me as well. However I did not want them to see their older sister who they are supposed to look up to crying in the fetal position about death. After about ten minutes or so with my mom I told her that I wanted to be alone for the rest of the night. She told me that she understands and quietly shut the door behind her. I had been crying for two days straight and was so emotionally exhausted that I finally fell asleep."

2) One thing that I love to do after watching a movie is to go back and look at the behind the scenes to see how the film was made. Personally what I find the most interesting is to see the production of the film as well as how the actors get into character. I love listening to the director and what they envisioned for the film and how they made it a reality.  By diving in and learning more information about the movie it gives me a greater appreciation for it. This interest of mine has led me to possibly pursue film studies as a major. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2_vB7zx_SQ (Avatar: The use of motion capture)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PhiSSnaUKk (Inception: The rotating hallway behind the scenes)

(I also recommend going on YouTube and looking at Inside the Actors Studio to learn about actors and actresses and the characters they play).